usvi-on-line
Would love opinion...not totally vacation related...
Oh - one final thought... don't feel like this is your only shot at getting down there... Discuss your dreams with your husband and set aside the time to find something you both could be happy doing (may be different things)and wait for the right opportunity and timing. It's fun to talk about and dream about anyway... A shared, long term goal can do wonders for your focus and closeness as a couple.
The more you visit and spend time down there, the more you'll recognize which businesses seem to do well and which ones' struggle. Take the time to talk to the owners and ask about how their day goes, how they like living there, etc... There is plenty of time!
The more you visit and spend time down there, the more you'll recognize which businesses seem to do well and which ones' struggle. Take the time to talk to the owners and ask about how their day goes, how they like living there, etc... There is plenty of time!
I love this part of PA - Macungie is not too far from me. Uppers Bucks County is unlike any other part of the US... yes, there are a lot of rich, rude people, and a lot of Q-Mart folks which aren't too pleasant to be around. But once you see past that, the scenery and the old farmhouses here are beautiful!!!! It's a great area to raise a family.
At the same time, I love St. John, and I envy the opportunity you have at hand!! Sooo exciting!! If I had extra money to throw around, I could see myself living down there too. Just simply l i v i n.
I agree with the others though - it will be hard. I went to that deli in November last year and had a breakfast sandwich, which was tasty, but there were no other customers. If you decide to actually go through with this business - make sure you serve breakfast! Porkroll would be nice too
As for what to tell the hubbie - I think you said it perfectly in your statement above. Speak to him from the heart but listen to his points of view too. Compromising is key! Good luck!!!! Sounds like it could be a great experience if it all works out!!
At the same time, I love St. John, and I envy the opportunity you have at hand!! Sooo exciting!! If I had extra money to throw around, I could see myself living down there too. Just simply l i v i n.
I agree with the others though - it will be hard. I went to that deli in November last year and had a breakfast sandwich, which was tasty, but there were no other customers. If you decide to actually go through with this business - make sure you serve breakfast! Porkroll would be nice too
As for what to tell the hubbie - I think you said it perfectly in your statement above. Speak to him from the heart but listen to his points of view too. Compromising is key! Good luck!!!! Sounds like it could be a great experience if it all works out!!
"Take it easy, walk with a light step" - Ween
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chicagoans
- Posts: 1586
- Joined: Thu Jan 18, 2007 2:51 pm
- Location: IL
Wow - that would be a huge life change for you. You have gotten some great responses here that I agree with (my first thoughts were about schools and child care.) Obviously your first responsibility is to your child, then your marriage... then far beyond that the choice of where to live. If living on STJ is best for the first two, then at least you've got a start in the right direction.
I've occassionally read some of the relo boards and they all advise that you need lots of money saved up to make the move. Like enough to live on for 6 months or so. Look hard at the numbers of the business and factor into that: paying for healthcare insurance, much higher cost of living, the fickleness (a word?) of the food industry on an island that relies on tourism seasons, etc.
My hubby bought a business about 7 years ago. It was a huge lifestyle change going from being a suit and tie portfolio manager to owning a very blue collar business and a bunch of trucks! We basically lived off my income the first year so luckily I had a good consulting year. We were self insured for medical and had no dental insurance. (Now I’m an employee of a different firm and have very good insurance – phew.) I’m saying this because it was a tough adjustment, and my DH was the one who totally and completely wanted to make the change. Couldn’t have happened without both of us really on board for it and even then we had some stressful moments. Now I love it because we both work from home most days so we’re both around after the kids get home, and through lots of hard work the business is doing well. So owning your own business can be great or it can be really hard – and usually some of both. It is certain to be lots of hard work but you already know that.
Another bit of advice I see a lot is to do a pre-move visit. I know you’ve been to STJ many times, but next time you need to go with the idea of living and working there. Talk to the locals – especially other business owners, visit the schools, look for housing, do some car shopping, hang out at the business and see what it’s like. Ask if you can work side by side with them for a few days to get a feel for it.
And about your husband’s job… is there a possibility of him piloting short interisland flights? He’d have to be recertified on different aircraft but at least it would let him have some steady pay and hopefully benefits while you manage the store.
BTW – Your parents sound terrific! Good luck with this very huge decision!
I've occassionally read some of the relo boards and they all advise that you need lots of money saved up to make the move. Like enough to live on for 6 months or so. Look hard at the numbers of the business and factor into that: paying for healthcare insurance, much higher cost of living, the fickleness (a word?) of the food industry on an island that relies on tourism seasons, etc.
My hubby bought a business about 7 years ago. It was a huge lifestyle change going from being a suit and tie portfolio manager to owning a very blue collar business and a bunch of trucks! We basically lived off my income the first year so luckily I had a good consulting year. We were self insured for medical and had no dental insurance. (Now I’m an employee of a different firm and have very good insurance – phew.) I’m saying this because it was a tough adjustment, and my DH was the one who totally and completely wanted to make the change. Couldn’t have happened without both of us really on board for it and even then we had some stressful moments. Now I love it because we both work from home most days so we’re both around after the kids get home, and through lots of hard work the business is doing well. So owning your own business can be great or it can be really hard – and usually some of both. It is certain to be lots of hard work but you already know that.
Another bit of advice I see a lot is to do a pre-move visit. I know you’ve been to STJ many times, but next time you need to go with the idea of living and working there. Talk to the locals – especially other business owners, visit the schools, look for housing, do some car shopping, hang out at the business and see what it’s like. Ask if you can work side by side with them for a few days to get a feel for it.
And about your husband’s job… is there a possibility of him piloting short interisland flights? He’d have to be recertified on different aircraft but at least it would let him have some steady pay and hopefully benefits while you manage the store.
BTW – Your parents sound terrific! Good luck with this very huge decision!
I know you're stressed about your husband's current job but I think, realistically, that he should keep his job (and the income) and you and your parents can take on the move to STJ and the business, of course, if your husband is agreeable. They say the chances of accidents in the air are less than on the ground. I know we'd all like to put our loved ones, especially our children, in a bubble sometimes but that's not realistic. Anyway, just remember, it's all in the presentation to your husband and he's your partner now (not your parents, no matter how wonderful they may be). As a pilot, I would think he could live anywhere. If things go fantastic on island, he can join you in the business if he chooses. If it doesn't work out, sell the business and move back to the mainland. Your parents can decide what they want to do at that point. So, don't buy a house, just rent. I say go for it...give this thing a trial run. Living there for awhile and giving the business a try will answer alot of your questions and you'll be able to find out more about the schooling for your daughter. Life doesn't need to be taken so seriously...nothing ventured, nothing gained. With all opportunites and change there comes some risk. You know your situation far better than the rest of us here....is the risk really all that great, too great?? Regardless of all this, you need to address this issue you have with the fear regarding your husband's job. I'm not saying it's unfounded because it's very real to you, I'm just concerned about the stress you're living with. You need to figure out how to diminish that level of stress that you have. It's not good for you, your child or your relationship. Anyway, good luck and I hope to see you running the Deli in the near future. Ali~
STJ - I "get it"
Thanks guys for all your insight. I really appreciate it. My hubby is now home safe and happy and we plan on talking tonight over a bottle of wine when Emma goes to bed.
We just have a unique situation compared to the rest of the world. As far as friends and family...we are down to my parents on my side and his parents, a sister and 3 nephews. (We lost 12 family members in the past 5 years, so it has been a really rough time). Ken's parents want nothing to do with us and in 2 years they have only seen Emma three times. We currently live on what is the rest of the family farm...When my grandma passed away in 2004, I vowed to do something different with my life. Everytime we have these funerals I just can't help but think that I do not want to not try something cause I am scared. Ken did interview with Seaborne last year and they said he could have a job whenver he wanted. Plus there are other numerous oppertunities for him such as teaching, scenic tours or even Cape Air.
I think now is the ideal time to do something since Emma is young. My mom, a retired ESL teacher has been approached numeorous times to help out with the Gift Hill Schools either tutoring or teaching so I know Emma would be in good hands.
I got alot of good advice during my last trip down from lots of business owners and think I have what it takes. I am used to the early mornings and late nights and there is something so special about the way of life on St. John. I know it will be hard work, but I am ready for a challenge. Down there I think I can teach Emma the good way of life...its not the kind of car you drive, how big your house is, or how much money you make, it is the family times, the beautiful scenery and a cheap meal with a fabulous view.
Crap...rambled on again. I will keep ya'll posted. Wish me luck. I think I better chill two bottles of wine!
We just have a unique situation compared to the rest of the world. As far as friends and family...we are down to my parents on my side and his parents, a sister and 3 nephews. (We lost 12 family members in the past 5 years, so it has been a really rough time). Ken's parents want nothing to do with us and in 2 years they have only seen Emma three times. We currently live on what is the rest of the family farm...When my grandma passed away in 2004, I vowed to do something different with my life. Everytime we have these funerals I just can't help but think that I do not want to not try something cause I am scared. Ken did interview with Seaborne last year and they said he could have a job whenver he wanted. Plus there are other numerous oppertunities for him such as teaching, scenic tours or even Cape Air.
I think now is the ideal time to do something since Emma is young. My mom, a retired ESL teacher has been approached numeorous times to help out with the Gift Hill Schools either tutoring or teaching so I know Emma would be in good hands.
I got alot of good advice during my last trip down from lots of business owners and think I have what it takes. I am used to the early mornings and late nights and there is something so special about the way of life on St. John. I know it will be hard work, but I am ready for a challenge. Down there I think I can teach Emma the good way of life...its not the kind of car you drive, how big your house is, or how much money you make, it is the family times, the beautiful scenery and a cheap meal with a fabulous view.
Crap...rambled on again. I will keep ya'll posted. Wish me luck. I think I better chill two bottles of wine!
That sounds much more do-able, knowing your husband has other opportunities. And I would so love to do what you are thinking. I am too lazy though.
Sounding like we might be getting some girlie sandwiches the next time we are in Coral Bay--Becky, better get moving on the recipes!
Sounding like we might be getting some girlie sandwiches the next time we are in Coral Bay--Becky, better get moving on the recipes!
"Sponges grow in the ocean...I wonder how much deeper it would be if that didn't happen."
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California Girl
Have you read "Desiring Paradise"? It's a great story about giving it all up and moving to St. John.
As far as the deli being a success, I think a lot of your success is based on how good your food is. If you make FABULOUS food, people will seek you out. I'd be PMing Liamsaunt for those recipes she offered!
Good luck in whatever you choose to do!
As far as the deli being a success, I think a lot of your success is based on how good your food is. If you make FABULOUS food, people will seek you out. I'd be PMing Liamsaunt for those recipes she offered!
Good luck in whatever you choose to do!
my two cents.
Good luck in your decision making. You both might be in a position that so many of us wish we could be in. And many of us have been reading the posts and sitting in front of our computers dreaming.
Enjoy the wine and the opportunity to sit w/ you DH and talk tonight. You both sound like you have good minds and marketable abilities to accomplish this dream.
God has plans for you, so listen to your inner voice and your hearts.
Peace & Grace be with you in the coming time. Know you will make the right choices, you have given much thought to this.
Good luck in your decision making. You both might be in a position that so many of us wish we could be in. And many of us have been reading the posts and sitting in front of our computers dreaming.
Enjoy the wine and the opportunity to sit w/ you DH and talk tonight. You both sound like you have good minds and marketable abilities to accomplish this dream.
God has plans for you, so listen to your inner voice and your hearts.
Peace & Grace be with you in the coming time. Know you will make the right choices, you have given much thought to this.
No ticker anymore. Next vac will prob. be the Fl Keys.
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Xislandgirl
- Posts: 4163
- Joined: Tue Aug 08, 2006 4:03 pm
- Location: Slightly left of center
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bubblybrenda
- Posts: 549
- Joined: Wed Aug 20, 2008 10:57 pm
- Location: Vancouver, BC
Good luck making your dreams come true.
I totally understand how death gives you a wake-up call; gives you a perspective on what truly is important to you and how you wish to live your life. I absolutely commend you for realizing that and for embracing what life could be if you're willing to take a risk.
Personally I like the question "what's the worst thing that could happen"? Can you live with the answer?
I totally understand how death gives you a wake-up call; gives you a perspective on what truly is important to you and how you wish to live your life. I absolutely commend you for realizing that and for embracing what life could be if you're willing to take a risk.
Personally I like the question "what's the worst thing that could happen"? Can you live with the answer?
~Brenda~