usvi-on-line
Vacation sans kids???
Vacation sans kids???
Hubby wants a week on St. John without the kids. I would love to go, the only thing holding me back is the plane ride!! I have heart palpitations every time I think about leaving my kids on the ground and getting on that plane. So my question is the to the folks that vacation without their kids..How do you do it? I know, I know, law of probability is that more people die in car crashes than air planes...
I welcome any words of wisdom!!
I welcome any words of wisdom!!
We have gone out of the country just the two of us without our kids many times. The first time is probably the hardest, but once you do it you may realize that it is really good to let go a little.
Give it a try and see how it goes...if you have fun do it again, if all you do is worry about the kids then it probably isn't for you. I would try it once.
We have really enjoyed going sans kids because it is a very different experience when we don't have to worry about being role models and feeding the kids and worring about their happiness more than ours.
We love our kids to death but we enjoy getting away too.
A couple drinks and an iPod on the plane help to let it go too...
Give it a try and see how it goes...if you have fun do it again, if all you do is worry about the kids then it probably isn't for you. I would try it once.
We have really enjoyed going sans kids because it is a very different experience when we don't have to worry about being role models and feeding the kids and worring about their happiness more than ours.
We love our kids to death but we enjoy getting away too.
A couple drinks and an iPod on the plane help to let it go too...
STJ Villa Map:
http://maps.google.com/maps/ms?hl=en&ie ... 2&t=h&z=14
http://maps.google.com/maps/ms?hl=en&ie ... 2&t=h&z=14
I feel your pain. I absolutely hate that part of it. I have been to the islands 3 times, and this last time was horrible for some reason, in regard to missing the kids, etc.
As far as the flight..you could always have your dr. give you a few Xanax tablets just to settle your nerves. Usually once I get there I am good, but like I said, this last trip, I just really missed the kids..
As far as the flight..you could always have your dr. give you a few Xanax tablets just to settle your nerves. Usually once I get there I am good, but like I said, this last trip, I just really missed the kids..
We usually try to take a vacation alone and take one with the kids..Not long trips...but at least a trip just for us without the kids...It gives us time for us and does us all good...including the kids. However, Last time we were on island I missed the kids something terrible, I felt really guilty for leaving them I guess. I didnt tell them we were going..(they were to go their dads for spring break..and I didnt want the drama from my ex) This year we are only doing one vacation and are bringing the kids with us this time and the kids wanted to come to STJ to see what its like instead of the usual cruise. But I believe as long as you leave them in capable hands there is nothing wrong with you having sometime alone. For me as long as I can call at least once a day and check on them...and they have a way to get intouch with me while Im away...Im fine..It can be tough to leave them at first...but I do think you should try it at least once and see what you think...you maybe surprised..It kinda nice not to have to worry about getting everybody orchestrated...even to go to dinner..much less that early morning snorkel..As someone said...get an Ipod...or MP3 and enjoy the time alone..even if its just for a few days..4 or 5 nights..You might be surprised..
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dtenel
- Posts: 158
- Joined: Fri May 15, 2009 8:37 am
- Location: My feet are in Michigan....My heart is in St. Thomas
We go every year for 10n days to STT with out our kids. The first time is the hardest, then it gets easier. It is great because we can talk to them on our cells phones all the time! Missing them is hard, but we really feel like we need the time away to be just Craig and Debbie.....instead of Mom and Dad. Plus, we also take them every year on a vacation, too, so they don't feel left out to much!!
As far as the plane ride....just put your head phones in and think happy thoughts! You are right that the law of probability is that planes are WAY safer then being in a car, but I understand how your head thinks to leaving your kids on the ground. Like I said, the first time is the hardest, but after that it gets easier! Try going with out them....I am sure you will do fine.
As far as the plane ride....just put your head phones in and think happy thoughts! You are right that the law of probability is that planes are WAY safer then being in a car, but I understand how your head thinks to leaving your kids on the ground. Like I said, the first time is the hardest, but after that it gets easier! Try going with out them....I am sure you will do fine.
Here's you you do it:
(The responsible section):
Update your wills.
(The not responsible section)
Get on the plane and go. Your kids will barely miss you. I'm a supporter of parent-only vacationing. In fact, this is the first time we're taking the 8 year old away with us for both vacations in a year. The baby gets to stay home...with her grandparents. We'll admit...we almost dread the thought of having little miss chatterbox with us for a week. We love her, but she can be a PITA and a week away from the kids helps.
(The responsible section):
Update your wills.
(The not responsible section)
Get on the plane and go. Your kids will barely miss you. I'm a supporter of parent-only vacationing. In fact, this is the first time we're taking the 8 year old away with us for both vacations in a year. The baby gets to stay home...with her grandparents. We'll admit...we almost dread the thought of having little miss chatterbox with us for a week. We love her, but she can be a PITA and a week away from the kids helps.
From someone that's been married for 35 years, raised and educated three children, all of whom are now married and raising/ starting their own families …
Your marriage deserves some time and attention, if you have the ability to take a week or so and reconnect on a much deeper level, it will definitely make you better parents. The best thing you can do for children is to love, nuture their other parent. Kids do NOT ALWAYS come first, kids that are raised to believe so are often self absorbed, and have a tough time as adults when they finally figure out that the world does not revolve around them. Your job as a parent is to raise independent, responsible, caring people. If you are fortunate enough to have people who are willing and able to care for the youngin's- I say GO FOR IT!
We always tried to get in a long weekend trip alone at least once a year when the kids were little, I know many people who after sending their youngest off to college, turned and looked at their spouse, and thought "who is this?" Please don't be one of these couples.
I will step off my soap box now
As far as the anxiety of air travel, I used to go the Xanax route, but found it took too long for the effects of the drugs to dissipate, so now I use Calmes Forte, an all natural relaxant. It calms me, but without that drugged feeling.
Your marriage deserves some time and attention, if you have the ability to take a week or so and reconnect on a much deeper level, it will definitely make you better parents. The best thing you can do for children is to love, nuture their other parent. Kids do NOT ALWAYS come first, kids that are raised to believe so are often self absorbed, and have a tough time as adults when they finally figure out that the world does not revolve around them. Your job as a parent is to raise independent, responsible, caring people. If you are fortunate enough to have people who are willing and able to care for the youngin's- I say GO FOR IT!
We always tried to get in a long weekend trip alone at least once a year when the kids were little, I know many people who after sending their youngest off to college, turned and looked at their spouse, and thought "who is this?" Please don't be one of these couples.
I will step off my soap box now
As far as the anxiety of air travel, I used to go the Xanax route, but found it took too long for the effects of the drugs to dissipate, so now I use Calmes Forte, an all natural relaxant. It calms me, but without that drugged feeling.
Patr
~~Longing to be back on St. John~~
~~Longing to be back on St. John~~
Patr speaks wisdom.
We've tried to have an "us" trip every year once our youngest was past his first birthday. My mom would come down and stay with them - she got grandkid time, they got grandma/break from Mom and Dad time, we got us time - win/win/win.
In those early days we'd usually go on a week long cruise, and towards the end of the week we, and especially my wife, would be missing the boys terribly!
Sixteen years later, and the "one whole family, one Mom & Dad trip per year" strategy is still going strong.
We've tried to have an "us" trip every year once our youngest was past his first birthday. My mom would come down and stay with them - she got grandkid time, they got grandma/break from Mom and Dad time, we got us time - win/win/win.
In those early days we'd usually go on a week long cruise, and towards the end of the week we, and especially my wife, would be missing the boys terribly!
Sixteen years later, and the "one whole family, one Mom & Dad trip per year" strategy is still going strong.
Come see us!
One important point I forgot to make....
One of the best things about going on vacation without our kids is that it gives us a real reason to want to go home at the end of the trip...we don't pine about missing them while we are away but we both look forward to seeing them when we leave to go home. Many people talk about "the walk of woe", for me it is the return to the whole family and a couple of big hugs!
Being alone with my wife for a week provides a glimpse into the past...what it used to be like before kids...not better but different and more about our feelings for each other and our individuality.
One of the best things about going on vacation without our kids is that it gives us a real reason to want to go home at the end of the trip...we don't pine about missing them while we are away but we both look forward to seeing them when we leave to go home. Many people talk about "the walk of woe", for me it is the return to the whole family and a couple of big hugs!
Being alone with my wife for a week provides a glimpse into the past...what it used to be like before kids...not better but different and more about our feelings for each other and our individuality.
STJ Villa Map:
http://maps.google.com/maps/ms?hl=en&ie ... 2&t=h&z=14
http://maps.google.com/maps/ms?hl=en&ie ... 2&t=h&z=14