usvi-on-line
STJ Part 13 - The St. John Sahara
STJ Part 13 - The St. John Sahara
LOL! I'm gonna fess up to something...every time before hitting the submit button on a new installment, I turn into a total chicken sh*t! I take a breath and a pause, then I click it like I've just clipped the wire of an atomic bomb and don't know if it was the right one or not. I usually wonder if this is the one that will get me in trouble or flamed and I even requested the editing help of forumite (whom shall remain nameless) to take a "sneak peek" on an early installment, so I guess I'm not really the balls out girl I thought I was. I definitely know that I'm not everyone's cup of trip report cause well, funny is the sense of humor of the reader right? I'm totally cool with that cause if we were all the same, nothing would ever be interesting, and I like interesting. I try not to take myself too seriously and I have it in my mind that laughing at myself at least once a day helps to keep me young. Knowing my issue with the "mam" word, I'm gonna try and hang onto young as long as I can, like say FOREVER! Anywho, I've received some really nice comments both on the reply and by all you chicken sh*t PM'ers out there LOL! Kidding! You've totally flattered me and I thank you all. Even those of you who don't "get" me but have been decent enough not to break out the flamethrowers, I appreciate the hell out of you for not politically correcting me, cause it takes all kinds to make the world go round and in case you don't know by now, I'm not really a politically correct kinda girl!
This morning, our last full day on island (isn't that a pi$$er?), I woke up with a serious case of pancake crave! It must be the carb thing again cause the hotcake smell from Critter Boy's plate yesterday is totally still lingering in my smeller. Because of that, it was pretty much a given that we ended up at Deli Grotto again for breakfast. I love that place! I guess I was the only oinker this a.m. cause nobody else wanted to eat just yet so I ordered me up a stack of the goods to go, along with some bagels & cream cheese and I'm pretty sure there may have been some chocolate somethings in the mix as well. For the road you know. I usually don't eat treats of sin like this at home ok, so I'm making good on making up for a serious amount of lost time.
After our pit stop at the Grotto, the plan for the day was to drive out to Salt Pond, hike over to Drunk Bay BEFORE it got blazing hot, then follow that up with some beach refreshment, throwing some yummy things in now and then and finishing it all up with a little shopping and the last supper. We leisurely made our way out, savoring every last second, knowing that this was the last drive out this way and parked the Jeep in the lot. We grabbed our gear and you should probably pay close attention to the fact that we left the cooler (with our drinks) in the back of the Jeep cause yeah, that was a REAL smart thing to do. We made our way down to the beach and I'm thinking "WHAT? That's not so bad. What's everyone bi*ching about?" Just freaking slap me right now ok! So we're down on the beach and I'm checking things out and I don't know, it kinda has a weird, peaceful, ominous vibe thing going on. Totally different look and feeling at this beach. Not bad, just different. It was the ominous that kept me from a snorkel though. It looked sorta murky which a couple whom had been snorkeling had confirmed, and since I don't do murky, the snorkel's staying dry thank you very much. Since we had decided not to snorkel this morning, we went ahead and made the maybe 20 minute trek out to Drunk Bay to check out the coral peeps. Drunk is a dramatically different coral bone yard and there be Jumbies there. The vibe is eerie cool, almost like a Nightmare before Christmas type thing going on there. Critter Boy and Drama Girl both took off to find some choice materials while Honey and I took a walkabout scoping things out, snapping pics, and soaking up the peculiar splendor of it all. Before we left, we checked out the new residents and then just for good measure, I threw in some Jumbie Rock Yoga since I didn't want any Jumbies hitching a ride home with me.
<a href="http://s87.photobucket.com/albums/k138/ ... C_1276.jpg" target="_blank"><img src="http://i87.photobucket.com/albums/k138/ ... C_1276.jpg" border="0" alt="Photobucket"></a>
<a href="http://s87.photobucket.com/albums/k138/ ... C_1277.jpg" target="_blank"><img src="http://i87.photobucket.com/albums/k138/ ... C_1277.jpg" border="0" alt="Photobucket"></a>
Back at the beach, I found the potty on the way out, had Drama Girl stand sentry at the door due to the lingering spookies and of course she had several descriptive adjectives to voice about the activity. I told her that if Lady Bird could use an outside potty room then I didn't see any reason on earth why she couldn't. Her response..."who the hell is Lady Bird?" Why even try right? So by this time, we've been out here for probably a couple hours now and we're realizing that we've all been thirsting for a while. We start back up the trail road to the Jeep and it keeps going...and going...and going, and I'm thinking holy sh*t it's HOTTER THAN THE PITS OF HELL OUT HERE!" and then Drama Girl chimes in with "HOLY SH*T, IT'S FREAKING HOT!" and "OMG! IT DIDN'T TAKE THIS LONG COMING DOWN!" and here's Nick with "I'm thirsty!" and we can't even see the top yet and I'm sweating like a pig and my leg muscles are like "OK, I'm done now, sit you're a$$ down" so I probably started bi*ching to Honey which didn't sit well with him since he had to remind me that he was the pack mule hauling all the crap out of there. It was PATHETIC let me tell ya. I swear we were like a caravan of 4 thirsty camels traversing the Sahara on a perilous 14 day journey without water but we could just feel that an oasis was oh so close. It was the KILLER! By the time we made it up to the Jeep, we practically crawled and clawed our way to the back where the cooler was located. You had four sets of paws that couldn't get in there fast enough. All four of us grabbed a bottle of water and knocked the entire thing back in one gulp, then grabbed a pop and knocked that back with no speaking and barely breathing. OMG did that ever feel better!
Note to self: NEVER EVER traverse the St. John Sahara without water. EVER!
After hopping in the Jeep and letting the A/C hit us full force in the face for a spell, we were totally ready to hit the beach, so we drove straight to Gibney where Drama Girl and I spent the next couple hours laying and Honey and Nick spent them snorkeling, playing in the sand and making friends with a local man boy that kinda gave me the willies. At one point, Honey was telling him about the Jumbie BBQ at Leverick Bay and you should have seen him jump to his feet and freak out! After the beach, Drama Girl had the most brilliant idea of heading to Columbos for the best smoothie in the wide world. The girl is brilliant I tell you but Honey decided to turn back into the a$$ saying he wasn't thirsty and most especially if thirsty entailed the $40 smoothies. Just so you know, it's totally ok for me to call Honey the a$$ formerly known as. I've more than earned the right being married to and putting up with his sh*t for the last 22 years, saavy? On the way back into town, I am milking that coconut smoothie, savoring every drop, knowing it will be my last cup of liquid gold for a REAL, REAL long time but I somehow managed to slurp up the last of it before we hit Woody's for some before dinner snacking. We ended up with shrimp skewers, onion rings, beer and booty shorts, but since happy hour was starting to kick in, we decided to hit the road before things got rowdy or raunchy enough to corrupt the little man.
<a href="http://s87.photobucket.com/albums/k138/ ... C_1295.jpg" target="_blank"><img src="http://i87.photobucket.com/albums/k138/ ... C_1295.jpg" border="0" alt="Photobucket"></a>
<a href="http://s87.photobucket.com/albums/k138/ ... C_1289.jpg" target="_blank"><img src="http://i87.photobucket.com/albums/k138/ ... C_1289.jpg" border="0" alt="Photobucket"></a>
After the tasty treats at Woody's I totally remembered I had forgotten the necklace I was suppose to pick up from the park vendor so we walked over to where she had it waiting for me and I went to purchase it along with a cricket cage exactly like the one in Mulan that Critter Boy found. I handed her a $20 and two $5's, one being one of the new ones with the big purple 5 on it. She looked at me like I had two heads and said "what is this?" then made me give her a different $5 without the big purple 5 on it. I guess she thought I was trying to pay with monopoly money, but I just kept my trap shut and gave her another 5. Alrighty then. So it goes without saying that of course Drama Girl found a water color print she had to have. You know when you want something REAL, REAL bad and it's going to consume you to the point that you're going to make yourself and someone else miserable if you don't get it? Maybe like that new handbag I just saw, shoes, or a pretty sparkly? Or for you boys out there, something electronic or a brand me new power tool? Well the want was of that sort but Honey said she was a spoiled a$$ brat "just like you". What? That's a bad thing? In any case, he's the one that princessed me so who's he to talk! I simply pointed out to Honey that we were on holiday and if we got it for her, we'd have a lovely peaceful evening, so without another word he ponied up and she walked out of the park with a smile and some artwork. He really should thank me, I saved him a fortune in whining.
Back at the villa, we cleaned up for the meal that wasn't even up for negotiation. It was Cafe Roma all the way baby. Upon arrival Nick said he wanted to go into Now n' Zen across the way, so we did. Probably not a great idea, the second we walked in, the Karate Kid zoned in on an antique samurai sword and was instantly in L.O! He held it in his hands like it was priceless treasure and even though he said nothing, his eyes said "PLEASE MOM! PLEASE!" Just at this second, sales lady points out that it's a "special antique used in martial arts training" (gee, thanks lady) and you should probably also know that Nick has studied martial arts for 5 years and will receive his junior black belt rank in September if he passes the final so this really didn't help matters like AT ALL! I told him I didn't know how we'd get it home, then I pried it out of his hands and we went and gorged ourselves on more of the scrumptious Chicken Fettuchini over at Roma. Honey had Pizza and Salad and Nick had some kid pasta. You know the drill right? YUM!
Back home for the night, I was unfortunate enough to get torture by laundry duty then if that wasn't bad enough, I had to start packing up on top of that. Drama Girl has some sort of weird rash so she's whining even though we thought we were in the clear. Went to bed that night knowing that this was our last sleep at Orchid Hill but worse still, I couldn't stop thinking about the PLEASE MOM PLEASE look in my little man's eye's when he was holding that damn samurai sword. Now that's a REAL pi$$er!
Wow, it was kinda hard for me to crank this one out. I must be running short on clever quips. Good thing I'm almost done or I might start boring myself...
Next Up: Little Man's Mom saves the day
This morning, our last full day on island (isn't that a pi$$er?), I woke up with a serious case of pancake crave! It must be the carb thing again cause the hotcake smell from Critter Boy's plate yesterday is totally still lingering in my smeller. Because of that, it was pretty much a given that we ended up at Deli Grotto again for breakfast. I love that place! I guess I was the only oinker this a.m. cause nobody else wanted to eat just yet so I ordered me up a stack of the goods to go, along with some bagels & cream cheese and I'm pretty sure there may have been some chocolate somethings in the mix as well. For the road you know. I usually don't eat treats of sin like this at home ok, so I'm making good on making up for a serious amount of lost time.
After our pit stop at the Grotto, the plan for the day was to drive out to Salt Pond, hike over to Drunk Bay BEFORE it got blazing hot, then follow that up with some beach refreshment, throwing some yummy things in now and then and finishing it all up with a little shopping and the last supper. We leisurely made our way out, savoring every last second, knowing that this was the last drive out this way and parked the Jeep in the lot. We grabbed our gear and you should probably pay close attention to the fact that we left the cooler (with our drinks) in the back of the Jeep cause yeah, that was a REAL smart thing to do. We made our way down to the beach and I'm thinking "WHAT? That's not so bad. What's everyone bi*ching about?" Just freaking slap me right now ok! So we're down on the beach and I'm checking things out and I don't know, it kinda has a weird, peaceful, ominous vibe thing going on. Totally different look and feeling at this beach. Not bad, just different. It was the ominous that kept me from a snorkel though. It looked sorta murky which a couple whom had been snorkeling had confirmed, and since I don't do murky, the snorkel's staying dry thank you very much. Since we had decided not to snorkel this morning, we went ahead and made the maybe 20 minute trek out to Drunk Bay to check out the coral peeps. Drunk is a dramatically different coral bone yard and there be Jumbies there. The vibe is eerie cool, almost like a Nightmare before Christmas type thing going on there. Critter Boy and Drama Girl both took off to find some choice materials while Honey and I took a walkabout scoping things out, snapping pics, and soaking up the peculiar splendor of it all. Before we left, we checked out the new residents and then just for good measure, I threw in some Jumbie Rock Yoga since I didn't want any Jumbies hitching a ride home with me.
<a href="http://s87.photobucket.com/albums/k138/ ... C_1276.jpg" target="_blank"><img src="http://i87.photobucket.com/albums/k138/ ... C_1276.jpg" border="0" alt="Photobucket"></a>
<a href="http://s87.photobucket.com/albums/k138/ ... C_1277.jpg" target="_blank"><img src="http://i87.photobucket.com/albums/k138/ ... C_1277.jpg" border="0" alt="Photobucket"></a>
Back at the beach, I found the potty on the way out, had Drama Girl stand sentry at the door due to the lingering spookies and of course she had several descriptive adjectives to voice about the activity. I told her that if Lady Bird could use an outside potty room then I didn't see any reason on earth why she couldn't. Her response..."who the hell is Lady Bird?" Why even try right? So by this time, we've been out here for probably a couple hours now and we're realizing that we've all been thirsting for a while. We start back up the trail road to the Jeep and it keeps going...and going...and going, and I'm thinking holy sh*t it's HOTTER THAN THE PITS OF HELL OUT HERE!" and then Drama Girl chimes in with "HOLY SH*T, IT'S FREAKING HOT!" and "OMG! IT DIDN'T TAKE THIS LONG COMING DOWN!" and here's Nick with "I'm thirsty!" and we can't even see the top yet and I'm sweating like a pig and my leg muscles are like "OK, I'm done now, sit you're a$$ down" so I probably started bi*ching to Honey which didn't sit well with him since he had to remind me that he was the pack mule hauling all the crap out of there. It was PATHETIC let me tell ya. I swear we were like a caravan of 4 thirsty camels traversing the Sahara on a perilous 14 day journey without water but we could just feel that an oasis was oh so close. It was the KILLER! By the time we made it up to the Jeep, we practically crawled and clawed our way to the back where the cooler was located. You had four sets of paws that couldn't get in there fast enough. All four of us grabbed a bottle of water and knocked the entire thing back in one gulp, then grabbed a pop and knocked that back with no speaking and barely breathing. OMG did that ever feel better!
Note to self: NEVER EVER traverse the St. John Sahara without water. EVER!
After hopping in the Jeep and letting the A/C hit us full force in the face for a spell, we were totally ready to hit the beach, so we drove straight to Gibney where Drama Girl and I spent the next couple hours laying and Honey and Nick spent them snorkeling, playing in the sand and making friends with a local man boy that kinda gave me the willies. At one point, Honey was telling him about the Jumbie BBQ at Leverick Bay and you should have seen him jump to his feet and freak out! After the beach, Drama Girl had the most brilliant idea of heading to Columbos for the best smoothie in the wide world. The girl is brilliant I tell you but Honey decided to turn back into the a$$ saying he wasn't thirsty and most especially if thirsty entailed the $40 smoothies. Just so you know, it's totally ok for me to call Honey the a$$ formerly known as. I've more than earned the right being married to and putting up with his sh*t for the last 22 years, saavy? On the way back into town, I am milking that coconut smoothie, savoring every drop, knowing it will be my last cup of liquid gold for a REAL, REAL long time but I somehow managed to slurp up the last of it before we hit Woody's for some before dinner snacking. We ended up with shrimp skewers, onion rings, beer and booty shorts, but since happy hour was starting to kick in, we decided to hit the road before things got rowdy or raunchy enough to corrupt the little man.
<a href="http://s87.photobucket.com/albums/k138/ ... C_1295.jpg" target="_blank"><img src="http://i87.photobucket.com/albums/k138/ ... C_1295.jpg" border="0" alt="Photobucket"></a>
<a href="http://s87.photobucket.com/albums/k138/ ... C_1289.jpg" target="_blank"><img src="http://i87.photobucket.com/albums/k138/ ... C_1289.jpg" border="0" alt="Photobucket"></a>
After the tasty treats at Woody's I totally remembered I had forgotten the necklace I was suppose to pick up from the park vendor so we walked over to where she had it waiting for me and I went to purchase it along with a cricket cage exactly like the one in Mulan that Critter Boy found. I handed her a $20 and two $5's, one being one of the new ones with the big purple 5 on it. She looked at me like I had two heads and said "what is this?" then made me give her a different $5 without the big purple 5 on it. I guess she thought I was trying to pay with monopoly money, but I just kept my trap shut and gave her another 5. Alrighty then. So it goes without saying that of course Drama Girl found a water color print she had to have. You know when you want something REAL, REAL bad and it's going to consume you to the point that you're going to make yourself and someone else miserable if you don't get it? Maybe like that new handbag I just saw, shoes, or a pretty sparkly? Or for you boys out there, something electronic or a brand me new power tool? Well the want was of that sort but Honey said she was a spoiled a$$ brat "just like you". What? That's a bad thing? In any case, he's the one that princessed me so who's he to talk! I simply pointed out to Honey that we were on holiday and if we got it for her, we'd have a lovely peaceful evening, so without another word he ponied up and she walked out of the park with a smile and some artwork. He really should thank me, I saved him a fortune in whining.
Back at the villa, we cleaned up for the meal that wasn't even up for negotiation. It was Cafe Roma all the way baby. Upon arrival Nick said he wanted to go into Now n' Zen across the way, so we did. Probably not a great idea, the second we walked in, the Karate Kid zoned in on an antique samurai sword and was instantly in L.O! He held it in his hands like it was priceless treasure and even though he said nothing, his eyes said "PLEASE MOM! PLEASE!" Just at this second, sales lady points out that it's a "special antique used in martial arts training" (gee, thanks lady) and you should probably also know that Nick has studied martial arts for 5 years and will receive his junior black belt rank in September if he passes the final so this really didn't help matters like AT ALL! I told him I didn't know how we'd get it home, then I pried it out of his hands and we went and gorged ourselves on more of the scrumptious Chicken Fettuchini over at Roma. Honey had Pizza and Salad and Nick had some kid pasta. You know the drill right? YUM!
Back home for the night, I was unfortunate enough to get torture by laundry duty then if that wasn't bad enough, I had to start packing up on top of that. Drama Girl has some sort of weird rash so she's whining even though we thought we were in the clear. Went to bed that night knowing that this was our last sleep at Orchid Hill but worse still, I couldn't stop thinking about the PLEASE MOM PLEASE look in my little man's eye's when he was holding that damn samurai sword. Now that's a REAL pi$$er!
Wow, it was kinda hard for me to crank this one out. I must be running short on clever quips. Good thing I'm almost done or I might start boring myself...
Next Up: Little Man's Mom saves the day
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gymnastika
- Posts: 291
- Joined: Fri Mar 28, 2008 10:01 pm
- Location: texas
This post made me laugh right out loud! I thought I would share with you a couple of passages from my travel journal from the day I went to Salt Pond...
...back to Coral Bay, then onto Salt Pond Bay. Now, the posted sign said it was 2 miles of trail to get to the beach, we grabbed the bare necessities and headed DOWNHILL to the beach..EASY!
now the passage about our leaving Salt Pond...
...decided to pack up and take the trail back to the parking lot, wanted to try and catch Vie's open. UPHILL, not easy!!! We seriously thought we would have to just sit down and accept death by thirst, as we had left the cooler in the car. We finally made it, and drank lemonade like thirsty pigs.
Thank you for sharing your memory, and resurrecting mine!
...back to Coral Bay, then onto Salt Pond Bay. Now, the posted sign said it was 2 miles of trail to get to the beach, we grabbed the bare necessities and headed DOWNHILL to the beach..EASY!
now the passage about our leaving Salt Pond...
...decided to pack up and take the trail back to the parking lot, wanted to try and catch Vie's open. UPHILL, not easy!!! We seriously thought we would have to just sit down and accept death by thirst, as we had left the cooler in the car. We finally made it, and drank lemonade like thirsty pigs.
Thank you for sharing your memory, and resurrecting mine!
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Xislandgirl
- Posts: 4163
- Joined: Tue Aug 08, 2006 4:03 pm
- Location: Slightly left of center
That is exactly how we felt walking up that damn hill. The only reason we did it was to show the newbies Drunk Bay and I told Chip that no matter how many newbies we bring back with us, we will NEVER do that again. I will show them pictures or even wait in the car for hours while they explore on their own.
Please don't end this report. I have enjoyed it so much.
Please don't end this report. I have enjoyed it so much.
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sailorgirl
- Posts: 1644
- Joined: Mon Oct 30, 2006 3:03 pm
Another Salt Pond trail hater! Hooray! I always feel kind of dumb when people say how easy that hike up is, but I really, REALLY hate it. It is SOOOO hot. We took a couple of trips when we did not even go to Salt Pond because I did not want to walk back up that stupid hot trail.
I love your reports. You have a great sense of humor.
I love your reports. You have a great sense of humor.
It's like looking in your soup and finding a whole different alphabet.
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designbyroe
- Posts: 1348
- Joined: Tue Feb 27, 2007 1:27 pm
- Location: Chilaxin on White Bay at least in my mind
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SanDiegoMark
- Posts: 93
- Joined: Wed Aug 08, 2007 10:29 pm
- Location: San Diego, CA