UGH

[djmom]

My 12 year old (7th grader) is now "going out" with someone. He texted her and asked her. It was like " I no I don't no u well, but wud u go out wit me?"

(Welcome to 2010).

"Going out" is like way back when-when we would "go" with each other but we wouldn't "go" anywhere.

She ran over to facebook and immediately posted she was "in a relationship".

She isn't allowed to go on a real date, but already I see the wheels turning, setting up going to the movies "with friends" during the day.

I just needed to groan to someone. She is a good girl and I think the guy must be kindof geeky based on a reaction someone had to her announcement.

So geeky is good. Right?

I am wondering if he will break up with her today since she posted that on facebook.

Or maybe that made him look cool.

[Berlingirl]

I feel your pain...I have a 7th grade girl too and I think they speak the same language here in Maine as in NC. I just checked her facebook to see if she was in a "relationship" and it says she is married to one of her best girlfriends. LOL! I will say that anytime she is on facebook she yells out to me when a friends relationship status changes...No more calling each other up like we used to at that age. Now it's texting and facebook.

[Marcia (Mrs. Pete)]

And the fun begins for you. We have three teen girls (19, 17 and 15) and a teen son ( 18 ). We've seen pretty much everything.

Don't stress too much about the "going out" thing. Set your ground rules, keep the lines of communication open and she'll be fine.

No matter how good your kids are, they will test their boundaries and your patience. And, they will make mistakes. They might disappoint you, too. It's all a part of the process.

Best advice: find yourself a really good hair salon and stylist; the gray hairs are going to come fast and furious over the next few years. When you attend her graduation from high school, or drop her off at college, you want to look like it was really easy getting her there.

[sailorgirl]

They are so anxious to grow up. If only they had the benefit of our hindsight!

[djmom]

Thanks for the comments everyone. I am trying to really step back and let her participate in some of the lesser evils (makeup, facebook, with supervision) to hopefully help her feel like I am not bearing down too hard.

Hopefully then she won't have to sneak behind my back.

I should add that a lot of my fears stem from my behavior when I was just a little older from her.

Frightening.

[Marcia (Mrs. Pete)]

Good plan, djmom. As an aside, we've always had the family computer in an open area where we all hang out. None of our kids has a personal lap top (except for the oldest, who is in college).

[Terry]

I'm so glad those days are behind us.
Facebook didn't exist and email was just developing when our two girls (two years apart) were in middle school. Cell phones were bricks and we equipped our girls with pagers to keep track of them. Times have really changed in a few short years.

I agree that keeping the "family" computer in an open area in the house is a great idea.

Patience, good example, family values, limitations, involvement in sports...I know you've heard these things already, but they are what got us through all the "tests".

As my mother would say..."this too shall pass."

[flip-flop]

Be on guard, even with geeks. Geeks are smart and than can spell creative trouble Not that I speak from experience or anything!

[Marcia (Mrs. Pete)]

Be on guard, even with geeks. Geeks are smart and than can spell creative trouble Not that I speak from experience or anything!

True that, Flip, true that.

[djmom]

This whole thing is not fun. she was texting and doing facebook for hours yesterday, at the same time. Apparently another guy is texting her too.

She has always been very pretty but very very shy. I guess she has come out of her shell.

I'm letting this go a bit because of the excitement, but there is no way we can live like this.

Normally we limit her time on the computer.

Someone mentioned sports. Yes, thank goodness for that; she is finishing steps to get her second degree blackbelt in Tae Kwon do, takes art lessons, confirmation and Girl Scouts. Hopefully this will help her keep her head on straight, or at least take up some time if nothing else.

And to think I have years and years of this ahead of me.

Yeah, Flip flop-I was a geek too and I know what you mean.

[waterguy]

For all you that had girls I feel for you god must of know I wouldn't of been a good father for girls he gave me 2 boys. Maybe I would of been a good father for girls just not their boy friends

[KatieH]

[quote="Marcia (Mrs. Pete)"

Best advice: find yourself a really good hair salon and stylist; the gray hairs are going to come fast and furious over the next few years. When you attend her graduation from high school, or drop her off at college, you want to look like it was really easy getting her there.[/quote]

Now that's fabulous advice!

[XOXO]

It sounds pretty innocent and sweet to me---but I don't have a daughter. (:

Isn't it just hilarious how kids interact now?? There are those who criticize it but I think it is brilliant.

Can you imagine if a boy wrote us a note when we were in 7th grade that said:

" I no I don't no u well, but wud u go out wit me?"

We would have NEVER thought he was the brainy geek but that he was in the "special" classroom.

Times have changed!

Gina

[JJShaw]

My 12 year old (7th grader) is now "going out" with someone. He texted her and asked her. It was like " I no I don't no u well, but wud u go out wit me?"

(Welcome to 2010).

"Going out" is like way back when-when we would "go" with each other but we wouldn't "go" anywhere.

She ran over to facebook and immediately posted she was "in a relationship".

She isn't allowed to go on a real date, but already I see the wheels turning, setting up going to the movies "with friends" during the day.

I just needed to groan to someone. She is a good girl and I think the guy must be kindof geeky based on a reaction someone had to her announcement.

So geeky is good. Right?

I am wondering if he will break up with her today since she posted that on facebook.

Or maybe that made him look cool.

I am in the same boat as you, I too have a 7th grader and she had this "going out with you" thing as well...I read some of the text messages he had sent...and I was like...can this kid not spell or what? Of course she is not allowed to date either...and did the relationship thing on facebook as well...I guess it makes them feel all grown up. Now the latest is "No more BF" and the symbol ; ) lots (meaning lots of tears) I of course can expect this as she grows up and goes thru the teen yrs ..but for now.. I just try to watch her and try to keep the communication lines open, know what shes doing and go from there..I have a 29 yr old son and I used to tell him..you know what..you didnt come with instructions...so we got to figure this out as we go...lol

[djmom]

Gina,
I pray it is sweet and innocent.

For sure it is not fun.

JJ-sorry about the BFF thing. That is the absolute worst. I feel for you.

Guys, I'm dying here. I just can't wait till summer so we get her the hell out of this town. She has completely changed this year and I am not sure it is all for the better.

Then she goes in a group to the movies and when she gets home posts a message on facebook about how she and so and so and so and so and HIM with a heart next to his name had SUCH a great time at the movies.

How do you have a great time at the movies? You go in, you watch it, you leave. (Ok smarty pants out there, I know how you can have a great time at the movies )

She doesn't like upsetting the apple cart (except mine) so I am worried she might have trouble saying "no". She said she slow danced with him at this middle school event so she wouldn't hurt his feelings. I told my husband it is time for HIM to deal with this. He can explain how a guy will give a sob story to get what he wants.

I'm thinking of jamming the wi-fi for a few days and losing the phone charger.

Possibly moving to Antartica.