usvi-on-line
Economic Stimulus Plan
Economic Stimulus Plan
This year, taxpayers will receive an Economic Stimulus Payment. This is a very exciting new program that I will explain using the Q and A format:
Q. What is an Economic Stimulus Payment?
A. It is money that the federal government will send to taxpayers.
Q. Where will the government get this money?
A. From taxpayers.
Q. So the government is giving me back my own money?
A. Only a smidgen.
Q. What is the purpose of this payment?
A. The plan is that you will use the money to purchase a high-definition TV set, thus stimulating the economy.
Q. But isn't that stimulating the economy of China ?
A. Shut up.
Below is some helpful advice on how to best help the US economy by spending your stimulus check wisely:
If you spend that money at Wal-Mart, all the money will go to China.
If you spend it on gasoline it will go to the Arabs.
If you purchase a computer it will go to India.
If you purchase fruit and vegetables it will go to Mexico, Honduras, and Guatemala (unless you buy organic).
If you buy a car it will go to Japan.
If you purchase useless crap it will go to Taiwan.
And none of it will help the American economy.
We need to keep that money here in America.
You can keep the money in America by spending it at yard sales, going to a baseball game, or spend it on prostitutes, beer and wine (domestic ONLY), or tattoos and piercing, since those are the only businesses still in the US.
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Q. What is an Economic Stimulus Payment?
A. It is money that the federal government will send to taxpayers.
Q. Where will the government get this money?
A. From taxpayers.
Q. So the government is giving me back my own money?
A. Only a smidgen.
Q. What is the purpose of this payment?
A. The plan is that you will use the money to purchase a high-definition TV set, thus stimulating the economy.
Q. But isn't that stimulating the economy of China ?
A. Shut up.
Below is some helpful advice on how to best help the US economy by spending your stimulus check wisely:
If you spend that money at Wal-Mart, all the money will go to China.
If you spend it on gasoline it will go to the Arabs.
If you purchase a computer it will go to India.
If you purchase fruit and vegetables it will go to Mexico, Honduras, and Guatemala (unless you buy organic).
If you buy a car it will go to Japan.
If you purchase useless crap it will go to Taiwan.
And none of it will help the American economy.
We need to keep that money here in America.
You can keep the money in America by spending it at yard sales, going to a baseball game, or spend it on prostitutes, beer and wine (domestic ONLY), or tattoos and piercing, since those are the only businesses still in the US.
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"Paradise...it's a state of mine"
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Ron in South Texas
- Posts: 249
- Joined: Mon Aug 07, 2006 4:15 pm
- Location: Skidmore, Texas
Funny! There is too much truth to laugh though.
People don't have jobs--and many who are lucky enough to still have their jobs are scared of losing their jobs--small and big business are cautious. I just can not see how a check is going to help:
It is like we are in the eye of a tornado.
People don't have jobs--and many who are lucky enough to still have their jobs are scared of losing their jobs--small and big business are cautious. I just can not see how a check is going to help:
- for the stimulous to work people will need to go out and buy
people need to have a job or they will save the money or use it to pay bills
employers aren't going to hire anyone until they have sales
sales will not increase because people are scared and need the money to survive
It is like we are in the eye of a tornado.
Connie thats funny 
Well kind of funny it's also kind of scary. Some how some way we must create decent paying jobs for the masses or we have peaked and were headin back down the mountain. Heck I work for the Germans at least for now. Anheuser Busch isn't even an American company any more, thats just wrong 
But I know if Uncle Sam stimulates me enough were taking an extra trip to St John 
Well kind of funny it's also kind of scary. Some how some way we must create decent paying jobs for the masses or we have peaked and were headin back down the mountain. Heck I work for the Germans at least for now. Anheuser Busch isn't even an American company any more, thats just wrong But I know if Uncle Sam stimulates me enough were taking an extra trip to St John 
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Teresa_Rae
- Posts: 2053
- Joined: Mon Oct 09, 2006 5:44 pm
- Location: Downstate IL
SJ - kinda like this?:
Federal Tax Credits for Energy Efficiency
On October 3, 2008, President Bush signed into law the “Emergency Economic Stabilization Act of 2008.” This bill extended tax credits for energy efficient home improvements (windows, doors, roofs, insulation, HVAC, and non-solar water heaters). Tax credits for these residential products, which had expired at the end of 2007, will now be available for improvements made during 2009. However, improvements made during 2008 are not eligible for a tax credit.
The bill also extended tax credits for solar energy systems and fuel cells to 2016. New tax credits were established for small wind energy systems and plug-in hybrid electric vehicles. Tax credits for builders of new energy efficient homes and tax deductions for owners and designers of energy efficient commercial buildings were also extended.
More details here: http://www.energystar.gov/index.cfm?c=p ... ax_credits
Federal Tax Credits for Energy Efficiency
On October 3, 2008, President Bush signed into law the “Emergency Economic Stabilization Act of 2008.” This bill extended tax credits for energy efficient home improvements (windows, doors, roofs, insulation, HVAC, and non-solar water heaters). Tax credits for these residential products, which had expired at the end of 2007, will now be available for improvements made during 2009. However, improvements made during 2008 are not eligible for a tax credit.
The bill also extended tax credits for solar energy systems and fuel cells to 2016. New tax credits were established for small wind energy systems and plug-in hybrid electric vehicles. Tax credits for builders of new energy efficient homes and tax deductions for owners and designers of energy efficient commercial buildings were also extended.
More details here: http://www.energystar.gov/index.cfm?c=p ... ax_credits
Let us live so that when we come to die even the undertaker will be sorry.
- Mark Twain
- Mark Twain
Check this out:
http://finance.yahoo.com/news/15-Compan ... 79875.html
Dollar/Thrifty, Chrysler, Rite Aid, Station Casinos, Blockbuster, Six Flags, Trump to name a few.
My fav...Krispy Kreme...bummer that the boutique of doughnut shops may not make it.
The magnitude of this all makes one want to book a trip to STJ to get away from all the bad news and veg on a beach with a cool drink in hand.
http://finance.yahoo.com/news/15-Compan ... 79875.html
Dollar/Thrifty, Chrysler, Rite Aid, Station Casinos, Blockbuster, Six Flags, Trump to name a few.
My fav...Krispy Kreme...bummer that the boutique of doughnut shops may not make it.
The magnitude of this all makes one want to book a trip to STJ to get away from all the bad news and veg on a beach with a cool drink in hand.