Not-So-Deep STJ Thoughts by 54b
I will be more than happy to donate the 3 brain cells I haven't managed to kill to science, and my liver too...
#18
When making what is widely referred to as the "walk of woe" to the ferry on the last day of vacation, I like to mitigate the sadness by skipping and affectionately referring to that stroll down to the dock as the Walk of Whoa - as in, "Whoa, why the (colorful four-letter metaphor) are we leaving St. John so soon?" And while waiting at the gate to get on the ferry, I innocently give my wife that "are you thinking what I'm thinking" half-smile that is easily mistaken for the "embarrassed because you just passed gas on the elevator" grin. And that's when the wife usually starts shaking her head and whispering in that tone that only women married to idiots can muster, "no...please not again...we have to get home...the kids...the pets...our jobs...you just can't." And I say, "what? You want me to lie to the customs agent? What if I really do have the 24-hour Swine Flu."
#18
When making what is widely referred to as the "walk of woe" to the ferry on the last day of vacation, I like to mitigate the sadness by skipping and affectionately referring to that stroll down to the dock as the Walk of Whoa - as in, "Whoa, why the (colorful four-letter metaphor) are we leaving St. John so soon?" And while waiting at the gate to get on the ferry, I innocently give my wife that "are you thinking what I'm thinking" half-smile that is easily mistaken for the "embarrassed because you just passed gas on the elevator" grin. And that's when the wife usually starts shaking her head and whispering in that tone that only women married to idiots can muster, "no...please not again...we have to get home...the kids...the pets...our jobs...you just can't." And I say, "what? You want me to lie to the customs agent? What if I really do have the 24-hour Swine Flu."
It’s not about yesterday or tomorrow...It’s about today, for come what may – Sun, rain, or hurricane – we've only time for a smile, and none for sorrow
- GotToGetAway
- Posts: 396
- Joined: Tue Mar 08, 2011 10:55 pm
- Location: FL
Thank you, GTGA, appreciate the encouragement...if I reach 10,000 views, Anthony said he'd send me a special VIOL t-shirt that reads: "Unfortunately, you have seen me on the forum."
#17
Did you know that if you take a picture of yourself taking a picture on the St. John Spice web cam, you can really see Jumbies in the photo negative? No, not really. But that would be cool if you could, right? Cuz then you would have an excuse to sing, "if there's something strange in your STJ neighborhood, who you gonna call - Jumbie-Busters!" Unfortunately, I could not find JUMBIEBUSTERS listed in the STJ phonebook and I didn't have any luck at Low Key Watersports when I tried to rent an unlicensed nuclear accelerating proton pack for catching ghosts. So we'll just have to hope the Jumbies on STJ prefer limin' instead of slimin'.
#17
Did you know that if you take a picture of yourself taking a picture on the St. John Spice web cam, you can really see Jumbies in the photo negative? No, not really. But that would be cool if you could, right? Cuz then you would have an excuse to sing, "if there's something strange in your STJ neighborhood, who you gonna call - Jumbie-Busters!" Unfortunately, I could not find JUMBIEBUSTERS listed in the STJ phonebook and I didn't have any luck at Low Key Watersports when I tried to rent an unlicensed nuclear accelerating proton pack for catching ghosts. So we'll just have to hope the Jumbies on STJ prefer limin' instead of slimin'.
It’s not about yesterday or tomorrow...It’s about today, for come what may – Sun, rain, or hurricane – we've only time for a smile, and none for sorrow
-
- Posts: 1903
- Joined: Sun Oct 08, 2006 10:17 am
- Location: Kentucky
As always, all compliments muchly appreciated, thank you JJ and KentuckyGirl...for the rest of you, the readings will continue until morale improves.
#16
If the Dos Equis beer spokesman, aka, The Most Interesting Man In The World, ever came to STJ, I would expect to find him holding court at the Beach Bar and regaling the ladies with stories about how he uses sea urchins for loofahs and how he always sees an Eagle Ray when he goes snorkeling, even in his villa pool...of course I also imagine that when a starstruck patron approaches the bartender and whispers, "I heard that the Most Interesting Man In The World is here and I want to buy him a drink even though I know he does not always drink beer...can you point him out to me," the bartender's response will likely be "sure, he's that grizzled, grey-haired lothario sitting over there." To which the befuddled patron will likely respond, "which one, half the guys here fit that description." Stay thirsty Beach Bar.
#16
If the Dos Equis beer spokesman, aka, The Most Interesting Man In The World, ever came to STJ, I would expect to find him holding court at the Beach Bar and regaling the ladies with stories about how he uses sea urchins for loofahs and how he always sees an Eagle Ray when he goes snorkeling, even in his villa pool...of course I also imagine that when a starstruck patron approaches the bartender and whispers, "I heard that the Most Interesting Man In The World is here and I want to buy him a drink even though I know he does not always drink beer...can you point him out to me," the bartender's response will likely be "sure, he's that grizzled, grey-haired lothario sitting over there." To which the befuddled patron will likely respond, "which one, half the guys here fit that description." Stay thirsty Beach Bar.
It’s not about yesterday or tomorrow...It’s about today, for come what may – Sun, rain, or hurricane – we've only time for a smile, and none for sorrow
- VI_on_my_mind
- Posts: 17
- Joined: Wed Apr 20, 2011 10:12 am
- Location: Boston MA
Won't be at the command post the next couple of days...here's for tomorrow and Saturday:
#15
I like that it's customary on St. John to always say, "good morning, good afternoon, or good evening" to people before conversing with them further. And it sure has taught me a valuable lesson about people and life and that lesson is as long as people greet each other politely, they can still conduct commerce while secretly harboring utter disdain for one another. But I don't ever want anybody to think I have hate in my heart or think of me as an irrational, impatient, thoughtless tourist. So on my next trip, I think I'll add an eyewink or a thumbs up to my pleasantries repertoire so that people know that I'm genuinely wishing them a good morning before asking why it's taking so long to get my food and why the price of Pop-Tarts on the island is so high and why I can't flush their toilet after going #1.
#14
When I'm on STJ next, I think I'm going to start a "Dodge-Beer" Team. It's a more devolved version of classic "Get in the water and drink a beer." In my version, you jump off a boat while yelling, “Beer me!” That's when your teammate back on deck tosses a 12-ounce can (16oz for professionals) in after you, hopefully avoiding your head, but falling close enough to your person so that you may locate said beer and chug it before resurfacing. The best part is even when you lose at Dodge-Beer, you still win, because canned beer floats. I know, who knew? Also my sponsors would like me to remind you to please drink and dive responsibly. Void where inebriated. Not recommended in contiguous United States or after eating an entire chicken roti. Dodge-Beer...It's Cantastic!
#15
I like that it's customary on St. John to always say, "good morning, good afternoon, or good evening" to people before conversing with them further. And it sure has taught me a valuable lesson about people and life and that lesson is as long as people greet each other politely, they can still conduct commerce while secretly harboring utter disdain for one another. But I don't ever want anybody to think I have hate in my heart or think of me as an irrational, impatient, thoughtless tourist. So on my next trip, I think I'll add an eyewink or a thumbs up to my pleasantries repertoire so that people know that I'm genuinely wishing them a good morning before asking why it's taking so long to get my food and why the price of Pop-Tarts on the island is so high and why I can't flush their toilet after going #1.
#14
When I'm on STJ next, I think I'm going to start a "Dodge-Beer" Team. It's a more devolved version of classic "Get in the water and drink a beer." In my version, you jump off a boat while yelling, “Beer me!” That's when your teammate back on deck tosses a 12-ounce can (16oz for professionals) in after you, hopefully avoiding your head, but falling close enough to your person so that you may locate said beer and chug it before resurfacing. The best part is even when you lose at Dodge-Beer, you still win, because canned beer floats. I know, who knew? Also my sponsors would like me to remind you to please drink and dive responsibly. Void where inebriated. Not recommended in contiguous United States or after eating an entire chicken roti. Dodge-Beer...It's Cantastic!
It’s not about yesterday or tomorrow...It’s about today, for come what may – Sun, rain, or hurricane – we've only time for a smile, and none for sorrow
LMAO...If you are not a comic by trade or on the side..you are missing your calling..You really should be a professional comic..very few articles I read make me laugh out loud..Im sure everyone here would agree with me...

54b wrote:Won't be at the command post the next couple of days...here's for tomorrow and Saturday:
#15
I like that it's customary on St. John to always say, "good morning, good afternoon, or good evening" to people before conversing with them further. And it sure has taught me a valuable lesson about people and life and that lesson is as long as people greet each other politely, they can still conduct commerce while secretly harboring utter disdain for one another. But I don't ever want anybody to think I have hate in my heart or think of me as an irrational, impatient, thoughtless tourist. So on my next trip, I think I'll add an eyewink or a thumbs up to my pleasantries repertoire so that people know that I'm genuinely wishing them a good morning before asking why it's taking so long to get my food and why the price of Pop-Tarts on the island is so high and why I can't flush their toilet after going #1.
#14
When I'm on STJ next, I think I'm going to start a "Dodge-Beer" Team. It's a more devolved version of classic "Get in the water and drink a beer." In my version, you jump off a boat while yelling, “Beer me!” That's when your teammate back on deck tosses a 12-ounce can (16oz for professionals) in after you, hopefully avoiding your head, but falling close enough to your person so that you may locate said beer and chug it before resurfacing. The best part is even when you lose at Dodge-Beer, you still win, because canned beer floats. I know, who knew? Also my sponsors would like me to remind you to please drink and dive responsibly. Void where inebriated. Not recommended in contiguous United States or after eating an entire chicken roti. Dodge-Beer...It's Cantastic!

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Hey Shaw, not a comic, but appreciate the compliment...nope, I'm much more dangerous...ad exec.
#13
Is there an inside joke going around the island because every time people get back from vacation on St. John, they say, "I get it." And then when I laugh coyly, trying to pretend like I'm in the know, they just look at me oddly and say more sternly this time, "no, I got it." And I'm like, "whatever, I got it too, in fact I got it twice last time I was there." And then they're like, "what, that's not even possible, you either get it or you don't." So I turn red in the face and that vein in my forehead pops out and l point at them and say, "it is too possible, why are you so afraid of awesome?" And that's usually when they just walk away shaking their heads. So then I yell out after them, "well at least I'll be back on STJ soon where I can just sit on the beach all day and not stress about trivial stuff like not being included on inside jokes. I'll get it one of these days, I will. You'll see."
#13
Is there an inside joke going around the island because every time people get back from vacation on St. John, they say, "I get it." And then when I laugh coyly, trying to pretend like I'm in the know, they just look at me oddly and say more sternly this time, "no, I got it." And I'm like, "whatever, I got it too, in fact I got it twice last time I was there." And then they're like, "what, that's not even possible, you either get it or you don't." So I turn red in the face and that vein in my forehead pops out and l point at them and say, "it is too possible, why are you so afraid of awesome?" And that's usually when they just walk away shaking their heads. So then I yell out after them, "well at least I'll be back on STJ soon where I can just sit on the beach all day and not stress about trivial stuff like not being included on inside jokes. I'll get it one of these days, I will. You'll see."
It’s not about yesterday or tomorrow...It’s about today, for come what may – Sun, rain, or hurricane – we've only time for a smile, and none for sorrow
Post Subject
I'm so glad the world has people like you.
Wish I could meet you in person at the BB...but then I'd probably pee myself or spit beer all over the place from laughing so much!
And since I'm not on Island this year
I'll enjoy reading your posts instead.
Keep 'em comin'!

Wish I could meet you in person at the BB...but then I'd probably pee myself or spit beer all over the place from laughing so much!

And since I'm not on Island this year

Keep 'em comin'!
Friends, they go away then they re-appear...I believe there is Magic here.