Black Eye, Prescription Snorkle Mask, Beach Bars and Jeeps
Posted: Wed Jul 30, 2008 10:45 pm
The title sounds like fodder for a Caribbean country music song. Maybe Kenny will read this.
I am one of those guys that little things can nag me...alot. As we were lounging around the villa, I noticed that the ceiling fan over the cabana bar was turning too slowly and in reverse. I couldn't stand it any longer and decided it was time to fix it. I navigated the myriad of light switches and knobs and nothing changed the speed of the fan. Time to crawl up on the wet bar and get to that pesky little switch on the fan itself.
I get up there, flip the switch, tug the chain and tell my buddy to hit the switch. Fan turns the right way and whirling away. All is good again in Ben's World. The TV right next to my shoulder is showing some video of a transvestite spoofing a Brittany Spears vid and my buddy and I have a good chuckle over it. I turned back around to get down and....WHAM!...fan blade to the face!
Now, remember, guys want to act like nothing happened when these situations occur. I jump down thinking that maybe no one saw this tremendous act of stupidity...but not so fast...roars of laughter erupt from the guys at the pool! I find my hat about ten feet away and then start the search for the specs. Good, there they are, look to be in one piece as well. Put them on my face and realize that they are a bit bent and dont feel right. My buddy David informs me that the eye is now bleeding. I bow out my chest, open a beer and act like everything is just fine.
I slipped into the rest room to examine the damage done and realize it wasn't the glasses that were bent. It was the swelling to the side of my head! At least my hair covered that, but the cut under the eye and the immediate knot there was more than I could cover...Just a nice shiner and bruised ego, nothing that I couldn't recover from.
Next day dawns and I awake to a strange site. I can see my cheek! Not in the mirror either! It's swollen out there good enough to enter my field of view. No fears, its off to Ocean Runners to get our boat and head to Jost! Nothing can stop us, let alone a little shiner.
About five minutes out of Cruz Bay passing Honeymoon, we open up the twin 200's and the men are grunting their approvals that come when loads of horsepower are transmitted to props. I turn my head to offer my grunt of horsepower appreciation when my glasses decide its time to grow wings and take flight! Glasses overboard and ego more bruised than my eye, I sit and brood as we head for West End and customs.
Smuggler's Cove and Jost are magical places that can cure any malady and within an hour, I am jovial and enjoying myself again....I can't see squat and have to rely on my wife to tell me where we are and what we are heading towards though.
I scratched my head for hours on what I am going to do about the vision issue..No spare glasses...no contacts... and enlightenment strikes!
We arrive back at Ocean Runners and I hightail it over to Low Key Dive Shop and within minutes, my vision problems are a thing of the past. Equipped with a neon yellow prescription snorkle mask firmly planted on my face, I head to meet the others at the Beach Bar. I ask David if the mask looks bad and he tells me that the hat pulled down a little lower hides most of it....Well that was horse crap!
<a href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/benchill/2691206084/" title="prescription snorkle mask by benchill, on Flickr"><img src="http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3267/269 ... 5ee8_o.jpg" width="600" height="800" alt="prescription snorkle mask"></a>
I spent a couple days wearing this around..town..stores..driving..bars..restarants..around the house. I became one with my mask and it felt "normal" after a day or so. You really get some looks when driving! The mask did a great job of hiding the shiner too. At least I didn't have to hear the "Did the good wife kick your @$$?" questions anymore.
The great folks at St John Eye Center next to the Dolphin Market came through with contacts for me on the morning of Day 3 with the mask. I felt let out of a cage! Much cooler than the fogging mask for sure and I didn't have to spit on them to keep them from fogging either. I happily dropped the mask off at Low Key and enjoyed the last day of my vacation - event free!
I am one of those guys that little things can nag me...alot. As we were lounging around the villa, I noticed that the ceiling fan over the cabana bar was turning too slowly and in reverse. I couldn't stand it any longer and decided it was time to fix it. I navigated the myriad of light switches and knobs and nothing changed the speed of the fan. Time to crawl up on the wet bar and get to that pesky little switch on the fan itself.
I get up there, flip the switch, tug the chain and tell my buddy to hit the switch. Fan turns the right way and whirling away. All is good again in Ben's World. The TV right next to my shoulder is showing some video of a transvestite spoofing a Brittany Spears vid and my buddy and I have a good chuckle over it. I turned back around to get down and....WHAM!...fan blade to the face!
Now, remember, guys want to act like nothing happened when these situations occur. I jump down thinking that maybe no one saw this tremendous act of stupidity...but not so fast...roars of laughter erupt from the guys at the pool! I find my hat about ten feet away and then start the search for the specs. Good, there they are, look to be in one piece as well. Put them on my face and realize that they are a bit bent and dont feel right. My buddy David informs me that the eye is now bleeding. I bow out my chest, open a beer and act like everything is just fine.
I slipped into the rest room to examine the damage done and realize it wasn't the glasses that were bent. It was the swelling to the side of my head! At least my hair covered that, but the cut under the eye and the immediate knot there was more than I could cover...Just a nice shiner and bruised ego, nothing that I couldn't recover from.
Next day dawns and I awake to a strange site. I can see my cheek! Not in the mirror either! It's swollen out there good enough to enter my field of view. No fears, its off to Ocean Runners to get our boat and head to Jost! Nothing can stop us, let alone a little shiner.
About five minutes out of Cruz Bay passing Honeymoon, we open up the twin 200's and the men are grunting their approvals that come when loads of horsepower are transmitted to props. I turn my head to offer my grunt of horsepower appreciation when my glasses decide its time to grow wings and take flight! Glasses overboard and ego more bruised than my eye, I sit and brood as we head for West End and customs.
Smuggler's Cove and Jost are magical places that can cure any malady and within an hour, I am jovial and enjoying myself again....I can't see squat and have to rely on my wife to tell me where we are and what we are heading towards though.
I scratched my head for hours on what I am going to do about the vision issue..No spare glasses...no contacts... and enlightenment strikes!
We arrive back at Ocean Runners and I hightail it over to Low Key Dive Shop and within minutes, my vision problems are a thing of the past. Equipped with a neon yellow prescription snorkle mask firmly planted on my face, I head to meet the others at the Beach Bar. I ask David if the mask looks bad and he tells me that the hat pulled down a little lower hides most of it....Well that was horse crap!
<a href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/benchill/2691206084/" title="prescription snorkle mask by benchill, on Flickr"><img src="http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3267/269 ... 5ee8_o.jpg" width="600" height="800" alt="prescription snorkle mask"></a>
I spent a couple days wearing this around..town..stores..driving..bars..restarants..around the house. I became one with my mask and it felt "normal" after a day or so. You really get some looks when driving! The mask did a great job of hiding the shiner too. At least I didn't have to hear the "Did the good wife kick your @$$?" questions anymore.
The great folks at St John Eye Center next to the Dolphin Market came through with contacts for me on the morning of Day 3 with the mask. I felt let out of a cage! Much cooler than the fogging mask for sure and I didn't have to spit on them to keep them from fogging either. I happily dropped the mask off at Low Key and enjoyed the last day of my vacation - event free!
That said, I am blind as a stinking bat without my contacts ( even the big E on the eye chart eludes me 
). I can relate to doing what had to be done. I always bring extra with me. Glad to hear you made the best of it 
.
